Embodied Family Wisdom is what happens when we stop trying to figure out what everyone should be doing and start getting interested in what is actually happening.

In our bodies. In our relationships. Between us. In the family system. In the milliseconds before we answer, explain, fix, rescue, defend, shut down, speed up, make something mean something, or decide we already know what happened.

There is so much information available there.

The body is brilliant. Behavior makes sense somewhere. The words we choose matter. What we notice matters. What we don’t notice matters. What happened right before something changed matters. And none of it, by itself, proves anything. We stay curious long enough to gather more.

This work pulls from nervous system science, behavior, psychology, somatics, relationships, language, patterns, perception, consciousness, and a whole lot of being willing to look again.

We can begin locating where we actually are, noticing what is already here, and having more access to choice when choice is actually available.

What We’re Doing Here

Most of us were taught to pay attention to the behavior we could see. The kid yelling, the partner shutting down, the thing someone said that pissed us off. Then we learned ways to manage it, change it, communicate about it, set a boundary around it, or try not to react to it.

I’m interested in what happened before all of that.

What did your body notice? What did you do next? What did the other person notice about you doing that? What happened between the two of you before either of you consciously knew you were responding to anything?

That’s where my work lives. In the distortion.

Embodied Family Wisdom gives us more places to look. Nervous system, behavior, language, relationships, family systems, perception, capacity, history, consciousness, and the meaning we make from all of it.

We’re not trying to become people who never react, make a mess of things or completely miss what was right in front of us. We’re getting more interested in being able to notice ourselves while we’re living our actual lives.

Is This Work for You?

I don’t know.

If your life is a list of problems to solve, this probably isn’t for you. If you’re looking for the answer, the right way, the five steps, or someone to tell you what to do so you can get everyone behaving again, you’re probably going to be annoyed here.

This work asks something different of you.

You’re going to notice things you didn’t know you were doing. You will see things you’ve spent a long time being very certain weren't yours. Some of what you already know is going to become harder to unlearn. You may get pissed off. Defensive. Confused. You may disagree completely.

Great! Join us.

The women who tend to stay are the ones who can be triggered and still curious. Who can have a reaction and slowly become interested in that reaction too. They are willing to consider that the thing they are absolutely certain about may not be the only information available.

You don’t have to agree with me. You don’t have to want to change what you find. You just have to be willing to look.